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A CHEMICAL ANALYSIS OF A WOMAN....
Element......Woman
Symbol.......Wo
Discover.....Adam
Atomic Mass...Accepted at 53.6kg, but known to vary from 40-200kg
Occurrances....Copious quantities in all urban areas.
PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:
!. Surface usually covered in painted film
2. Boils at nothing; freezes withiout known reason
3. Melts if given special treatment
4. Bitter if incorrectly used
5. Found in various states from virginmetal to common ore
6. Yields if pressure allpied in correct places.
CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Has great affinity for gold, silver, and precious stones
2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances
3. May explode spontaneously without warning
4. Activity increases greatly by saturation in alcohol
5. Most powerfull money reducing agent known to man
COMMON USES:
1. Highly ornimental, especially in sports cars
2. Can be a great aid to relaxation
3. Very effective cleaning agent
TESTS:
1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in the natural state
2. Turns green when placed beside a better specimen
HAZARDS:
1. Highly dangerous except in experianced hands
2. Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be mantained at differant locations as long as specimens do not come into direct contact with each other
3. Should you experiance itching, burning, or rash, then discontinue use immediately and seek medical treatment.
Element......Woman
Symbol.......Wo
Discover.....Adam
Atomic Mass...Accepted at 53.6kg, but known to vary from 40-200kg
Occurrances....Copious quantities in all urban areas.
PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:
!. Surface usually covered in painted film
2. Boils at nothing; freezes withiout known reason
3. Melts if given special treatment
4. Bitter if incorrectly used
5. Found in various states from virginmetal to common ore
6. Yields if pressure allpied in correct places.
CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Has great affinity for gold, silver, and precious stones
2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances
3. May explode spontaneously without warning
4. Activity increases greatly by saturation in alcohol
5. Most powerfull money reducing agent known to man
COMMON USES:
1. Highly ornimental, especially in sports cars
2. Can be a great aid to relaxation
3. Very effective cleaning agent
TESTS:
1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in the natural state
2. Turns green when placed beside a better specimen
HAZARDS:
1. Highly dangerous except in experianced hands
2. Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be mantained at differant locations as long as specimens do not come into direct contact with each other
3. Should you experiance itching, burning, or rash, then discontinue use immediately and seek medical treatment.
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