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I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing.
I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.
FOR EXAMPLE:
One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says \"I don\'t feel like it, I just want you to
hold me.\"
I said \"WHAT????!!! What was that?!\"
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... \"You\'re just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.\"
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, \"Can\'t you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?\"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store.
I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn\'t decide which one to take so I told her we\'ll just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit.
We went onto the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings.
Let me tell you...she was so excited.
She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn\'t even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, \"That\'s fine, honey.\"
She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, \"I think this is all dear, let\'s go to the cashier.\"
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, \"No honey, I don\'t feel like it.\"
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled \"WHAT???!!!\"
I then said, \"Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while.You\'re just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.\"
Just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, \"Why can\'t you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?\"
Apparently I\'m not having sex tonight either.
I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.
FOR EXAMPLE:
One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says \"I don\'t feel like it, I just want you to
hold me.\"
I said \"WHAT????!!! What was that?!\"
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... \"You\'re just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.\"
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, \"Can\'t you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?\"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store.
I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn\'t decide which one to take so I told her we\'ll just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit.
We went onto the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings.
Let me tell you...she was so excited.
She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn\'t even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, \"That\'s fine, honey.\"
She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, \"I think this is all dear, let\'s go to the cashier.\"
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, \"No honey, I don\'t feel like it.\"
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled \"WHAT???!!!\"
I then said, \"Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while.You\'re just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.\"
Just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, \"Why can\'t you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?\"
Apparently I\'m not having sex tonight either.