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Nicked from elsewhere
Spent an hour and a half in a traffic jam this morning en route to work because some prat had put his or her Chelsea Tractor* on its roof.
Like other rational people, I drive on the roads which my Government has built for me out of my taxes. I do not drive across fields, hillsides, mountainsides and swamps, because I am neither a farmer, nor a country landowner, nor a member of the Armed Services.
Because I drive on roads, I drive a car. Its makers have been at pains to ensure that its suspension, braking and centre of gravity are suited to being driven at the legal speed limit on a road. Because I have a boat and a family, I drive an estate car, which combines the handling of a car with the internal volume of a Poseursmobile*, so that, when some berk pulls out in front of me, I am able to brake without turning the thing tits up, and I get fifty miles per gallon out of it at the aforemenmtioned national speed limit, which I would not get out of a Tonka Toy*.
People who own Tonka Toys* and who drive their Chelsea Tractors* on motorways are welcome to carry on killing themselves, thereby improving the gene pool, so far as I am concerned, but I would prefer them not to do it in the rush hour.
* AKA "SUV", Porsche Cayenne, Range Rover, Toyota Land Cruiser, Land Rover Discovery, and many other cars with even sillier names, which silly women with more money than sense drive to collect their snotty brats from school because the said brats don't have the sense to walk to and from school.
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I have no problem with farmers on tractors; live in a country district, come from farming stock.
The term "Chelsea Tractor" is a sarcastic term used in the UK to designate any four wheel drive SUV which is owned by a city dweller and is never used for going off road.
Chelsea is the most expensive and fashionable part of London.
Spent an hour and a half in a traffic jam this morning en route to work because some prat had put his or her Chelsea Tractor* on its roof.
Like other rational people, I drive on the roads which my Government has built for me out of my taxes. I do not drive across fields, hillsides, mountainsides and swamps, because I am neither a farmer, nor a country landowner, nor a member of the Armed Services.
Because I drive on roads, I drive a car. Its makers have been at pains to ensure that its suspension, braking and centre of gravity are suited to being driven at the legal speed limit on a road. Because I have a boat and a family, I drive an estate car, which combines the handling of a car with the internal volume of a Poseursmobile*, so that, when some berk pulls out in front of me, I am able to brake without turning the thing tits up, and I get fifty miles per gallon out of it at the aforemenmtioned national speed limit, which I would not get out of a Tonka Toy*.
People who own Tonka Toys* and who drive their Chelsea Tractors* on motorways are welcome to carry on killing themselves, thereby improving the gene pool, so far as I am concerned, but I would prefer them not to do it in the rush hour.
* AKA "SUV", Porsche Cayenne, Range Rover, Toyota Land Cruiser, Land Rover Discovery, and many other cars with even sillier names, which silly women with more money than sense drive to collect their snotty brats from school because the said brats don't have the sense to walk to and from school.
...
I have no problem with farmers on tractors; live in a country district, come from farming stock.
The term "Chelsea Tractor" is a sarcastic term used in the UK to designate any four wheel drive SUV which is owned by a city dweller and is never used for going off road.
Chelsea is the most expensive and fashionable part of London.
I'm glad Fin (8-ish) was there to find the right page in the manual though.
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