one mussel saved my life and a big fish story

[cod magnet]

well wee have all heard about the big fish lost stories , here is a tale never to be forgotten , the last big storm we had i fished the high drum on the south dock , got on when the sea was making ,3 hours later the sea was the biggest i have ever seen , i was trapped no way of even at low water it was just to big , so i thought i would stick it out, i was living alone at the time so no one to miss me ,after 5 days had gone bye , i was starting to get delirious through lack of food and dehydration think i would of had a hour to live , i was down to my last mussel, so just dropped the line down the side of the drum , within a minute i got a huge bite the fight was on , after a half hour i managed to hand ball a 25 pound cod over the drum head , when it crashed to the ground it spewed a full carton of fresh milk up it must of just eaten , so i drank the four pinta and felt a lot better within minutes, the sun came out and the sea dropped so i gutted the fish which saved my life in side its stomach was a pawn ticket , so as i walked home with the fish over my shoulder i popped in to the pawn shop and got my self a lovely rolex gold watch , what a catch

[PETER]

a think you need to stop sniffing glue mate

[Scotty91]

Are stay off them magic tea bags lol

[FISHERMAN]

Wat a legend . Thats one for the grandkids

[Daysofspeed]

I'll be having my watch back then!

[codseeker]

you wud of survived with one worm marra welldone

[rocketman]

well mate looks like the electric shock treatment you were having isnt working, you should ask your doctor if you can go back in hospital in that room you were in before when i visited you, remember the one with the thickly padded walls, and tell him you need to be wearing that jacket you wore while in your room, remember the one where your hannds tie behind your back

[cod magnet]

yeah been sniffing the petrol tank again

ya arny jealous because i am a better fisherman than you, a better caster than you, , a better shot better looking than you and a better shag i can prove it all cause our lass told me

[rocketman]

ya arny jealous because i am a better fisherman than you, a better caster than you, , a better shot better looking than you and a better shag i can prove it all cause our lass told me

you must have one of those mirrors off the fairground seen a better head on a toby jug

[Scotty91]

Lol

[Mad as a fish]

You have to be on day release from the sanatorium mate

[rocketman]

You have to be on day release from the sanatorium mate

he is on release mate ,but its unofficial , broke into the female nurses changing rooms and got dressed up as a female nurse (see hes back to his old ways) them slipped past security , hes officially awol

[cod magnet]

he is on release mate ,but its unofficial , broke into the female nurses changing rooms and got dressed up as a female nurse (see hes back to his old ways) them slipped past security , hes officially awol

Thats not true as you no i suffer from OCD and was rushed into hospital, i just couldnt stop thinking of biscuits , when i finnally saw a shrink he asked my name , i replied custard cream , come on whats really wrong with you he says , i say jaffa cake , anyways shrink gans out of the room for a wee wee , so i thought its time to pull myself together ,got 2 biscuits out me pocket and thought they would help then the nurse walked in the room unexpectably , she says what do you think you doing i reply fucccing crackers

[safc]

Keep off the smack marra

[rocketman]

yeah ya crackers alright pal
tell them abot the time u had to drop that 300 quid off at your mates through durham, you know the one with the sexy young thai bride